Yesterday I hit a bump in the life map that made me begin to reflect on my past decisions and I (with my positive, Polly Anna, Glass Half Full self) began to feel myself crying over spilled milk.
I have always loved Real Estate. Investing, Selling, Buying, Flipping, EVERYTHING about it makes me so Über intrigued! So… this semester I made the commitment that I’m going to get my license in California; not just ANY license, my BROKER’s license. I’m humming along in class, reading the books, studying and … BANG I find out that the requirements have changed and I can’t get a CA Broker’s License in less than 1 year anymore. BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! They changed the requirements, so it’s gonna take me TWICE as long! I say again… BBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Now, mind you, I’ve paid for this course already and just didn’t complete it. I have the books, the CD’s, and all the supplemental materials. Last year I could have done it according to my original plan. I should also say that I’ve had this plan for almost five years now. Yes, since BEFORE I moved from Detroit. So what stopped me? Mainly procrastination and fear – but also life shifts.
Monetarily I estimate that I’ll forego about $200-400K because I didn’t get my license last year and probably twice that if I count all the way back to my plans starting with the move from Detroit. It was this moment when… I began to cry over the spilled milk. All the procrastination and fear have kept me from, my books, my classes, my speaking, my coaching, travel, career choices and the list goes on and on. Then I realized that our life journey isn’t just about the moments lost and the things we accomplish. Life is a series of lessons.
We learn and grow in “ages and stages” as my Granny used to say. What doesn’t fit for us today may fit for us tomorrow. Likewise, what we are doing now, we might not have been fully equipped for yesterday. We learn and grow in as we go along, and it’s our job to learn the lessons and keep moving to the goal. Crying over spilled milk breeds regret, and keeps your focus stuck on the past. So what do we do?
- Dry Your Tears – The milk is already spilled. Look at it. It’s all over the floor.
- Forgive Yourself – You are human and we all make mistakes. It’s not the end of the world. Life does go on. Give yourself a break.
- Decide how you should handle it – What’s the best next step from here? Most often we want to go back in time and change the outcome. That’s month realistic. I mean, can you put it back in the container? Not without concerted efforts…and are your efforts best spent focused on the task of recapturing the milk and working so hard to get it back where it was? Even with all your efforts you’ll never recapture all the milk because its just not possible. Think about it, evaporation, floor cracks, the towel or sponge you use I will all retain a part of the milk. You can’t get it all.
- Learn – YES! Learn what you did to spill the milk in the first place and try not to repeat it in your future.
- Clean it up – Do what you have to to clean up the situation and move on from there. Just because you can’t recapture the milk doesn’t mean you don’t clean up the spill.
- Recognize – Recognize that sometimes when we THINK we’re ready for something were NOT. Sometimes we have to live through a few things in order to truly be ready for what we want.
- Let It Go – It’s just that simple… Just let it go.
So, I learned to stop crying over the spilled milk in my past. The if I coulda, shoulda, woulda moments that cause me to pause from my pace on the journey. I’ve learned to be grateful for every step of the process of becoming the best version of myself. So, no more tears. When you find yourself crying over the spilled milk in your life, remember we live our lives through “Ages and Stages”. That’s what my Granny called it.